Each week (hopefully), Collared Girls will be highlighting a person or persons within the BDSM/kink community. Each have been kind enough to answer a series of questions describing their lifestyle, offering advice to others, and just having some fun (FYI: The answer to #8 should ALWAYS be “crunchy”). We know each of us have a different vantage point and view of our Dominance and submissiveness. We want to know more. By knowing more, we learn more. And isn’t our lifestyle, in all its variations, about learning and guiding and growing in order to be better people, more open and honest and happier? We are all slightly different in our practices and seeing and reading and hearing what others in our community do often helps inform our own practices. This week, we are happy to post the answers to our questions from… Obsidian Rayne:
- What type of Dominant do you describe yourself as (Daddy/Mommy, Lifestyle, Financial, etc.)?
I find myself being a Sensual Dom more than anything. With my emotions, I don’t usually like causing pain towards playmates like whipping and the harder stuff. I like being more with sensations and feelings. Like using a Wart Wheel, violet wand, ice, fire, wax.
- How would you describe being a Dominant to the playperson?
I would describe it as a “relationship” of sorts with 2 ppl. All the same things are there like trust, safety, open communication. Also an agreement as with both players as in what goes on in each session.
- How’d you get started? Tell us about how you discovered your dominant persona?
I discovered it just as being a sub and it almost felt like an evolution as in knowing what I like, how the scenes work as well as behind the scenes of it all.
- What is your favorite toy? Do you have a set of beloved go-to toys that you enjoy most of all? Would you share with us what they might be?
My go-to would be my violet wand Set! It’s something that can be used from beginners to the experienced as well as with the additions attachments.
- What is the one thing that’s most misunderstood about our lifestyle?
One thing i think is with mental health and the scene. I know there has been times where ppl won’t play with others because they have heard they have mental issues but that’s not the case. It’s not like they will go ballistic or some other stereotype that ppl may think. most ppl are more safe in my case and need to be addressed.
- Describe your relationship status (single, poly, married and poly, D/s only with no outside involvement, etc.):
I’m solo poly with a trans sub play partner
- Totally random: If you could be any other creature (besides human), what would it be and why?
I would like to be an Owl just for that fact that they can see all around them and are usually up at night.
- Another totally random question: Crunchy or smooth peanut butter, and why?
Crunchy. Smooth is just too bland
- What’s been you BEST/most rewarding experience in the lifestyle?
The most rewarding is having your sub nestled in you and knowing you have total trust from her .
- Conversely, what’s been your worst experience?
Worst, there’s something. Worst would just be cliques and rumors. Having someone jealous or feeling bitter about you and spreading something not true just to have them outed and welcomed to events.
- What are your favorite sites? They don’t even need to be BDSM/kink related.
My fave sites would be Northbound Leather, http://Kink.com , and mainly twitter.
- What advice do you have for newbies to the lifestyle? What do you recommend as the first step into BDSM people take? Why?
Go to munches, communicate with others, don;t be afraid to share what your kinks are, take time in others, and try new things!!!
Check out the other posts you may have missed:
- BDSM and Kink Shorts: “Girls” and “Collars” by “The Most Nefarious Sonny Lumière”
- Dominant Mike (@friartuck379)
- submissive Edward Cantor
- submissive amadeo
- Dominant PandaDaddyDom
- submissive Lilpandakitten
- Domme Mistress Hyde
- Daddy Kenneth Scott
If you’re interested in participating in this series, or just writing some short content for us, please slide into my Twitter DMs (@IAmMissRuby) or email me at firstname.lastname@example.org.