Duct Tape, Belts, Zippers and Butter Knives: A Basic Adult BDSM Tools Guide for D/s Novices

To start, this is a piece for novices, those entering our BDSM community with limited knowledge of the multifaceted lifestyle we live. To that end, I want to preface the following with this: I care about how novices engage in the newness of BDSM and, particularly, D/s relationships. To that point, I’m making some frugal adult BDSM tool suggestions for when you and your lovely sub engage in play. These suggestions will allow you to experiment to see what you and your sub enjoys before you invest in the best BDSM tools. After all, not all subs love intense pain, so you need to test the waters before buying a beautiful riding crop and a quality paddle, which may end up collecting dust somewhere.

Let’s be honest: the BDSM tools we Dominants love to use are often very expensive. No Dominant worth their weight in pain will ever use a tool found on Etsy or Amazon or some other place selling “toys for adults.” We need to always use the highest quality We don’t want something that could last 2 sessions or splinter and hurt our s-types. But the best quality is expensive.

Professional and Lifestyle Dominants who work with several clients–“submissives“–obviously are often working within a reasonable budget which allows for high quality toys and implements. What of those of you who keep a minimum number of devoted 24/7 pets, or those of you just entering and experiencing the primal urge for more “spice” in your relationship?

How do we do that regardless of your experience level and fiscal capacity to spend? How do you have fun while keeping expenses down as you a good feel for the BDSM lifestyle?

KEEPING IT CHEAP

“Cheap” is a tricking word. Rhetorically, it conjures images of flimsily made items that break in a couple of days. I’m using it as the word to saving money while still having quality tools.

It may surprise you there are a number of “tools” right in your house or that can be bought at your locate hardware store and apothecary that you can easily start with (or use forever), saving thousands of dollars if you’re a small-time, extremely selective Dominant or a novice testing what you enjoy.

BINDING/RIGGING

One of the most prominent visuals people have of BDSM is rigging. Helpless women (and men) bound by ropes and strung up like the deer you killed on opening day of hunting season. It’s a fascination, and often people want to start here. For binding, you can use rope, but you can’t use any basic rope; use a nylon rope (see “caveat” below). Remember, you’re tying up a human being. Everyday rope can cause all sorts of issues. So rather than spending the money on the rope, look in your work drawer and spy that roll of duct tape (see caveat below).

Duct tape is fantastic for bondage. It can be used in many ways. It’s he Dominant’s best friend in my opinion. It can be used to bind the extremities, as a gag, even as a blindfold. It can be the first test to see if your submissive enjoys being bound to the bed. Just wrap the sturdiest tape you can find under the bed and secure it to each wrist

and each ankle, and there you go, a cheap and effective test for your kink.

A CAVEAT on duct tape: substituting duct tape can be dangerous. And depending on how much is used and in what ways, it could be more expensive. Additionally, the application of duct tape MUST be thoughtful. Some people are able to have it in direct contact with their skin. For others it can be an irritant or even hurt. So to use it effectively first find out how sensitive your sub’s skin is. It may be wise, nonetheless, to put a layer underneath, which may or may not be cut during the unfettering process. In some ways, the underneath layer may end up making it more expensive and buying a nice white nylon rope would be the better choice. And with the rope, if you don’t like it, it can always be used I some mundane manner.

SENSORY DEPRIVATION

Enjoy sensory deprivation? Welcome to my specialty. I love this aspect as well as sadism.

While I don’t advocate for duct tape blindfolds, many do. However, if you’re a novice (though many experience Dominants do this too) I recommend you use a scarf for the eyes…or buy a $10 blindfold if you don’t have a suitable scarf.

For the hearing, use those earbuds and, if you have a set, a pair of regular over the ears headphones. There are ear plugs you can buy that have a very high noise reduction rating (NRR); 33 NRR appears to be the best. If you want to pop the money on those, they will run you about $20.

Here’s my favorite though. To ensure your pet doesn’t feel anything you don’t want them to use saran wrap. Some will use it for mummification, but I suggest using it to individually wrap the toes and fingertips. This takes away all sense of touch the pet has. They can still feel the touches you apply and whatever they are on, but their true ability to acquire tactile stimulation for themselves is diminished significantly, thereby elevating the session significantly. Simple right?

Need a gag? Be careful here. You do not want to stick anything in your pet’s mouth unless it is agreed upon and you have taken significant precautions. Pets can end up choking on panties in the mouth. So what’s a frugal novice Dominant supposed to do?

OTHER FUN and SOME NOVEL NOVICE SADISTIC IDEAS

Sadism is so much fun! You can’t get the full effect of sadism using “everyday tools,” but you can get a feel for it.

Instead of a pinwheel, take a butter knife. Using the serrated edge you get a very similar sensation. If you have your pet locked out of sensory input, then this will make them start. The wonderful part of it is that it’s in your kitchen drawers already.

Laundry clips make a great substitute for expensive nipple clamps. With these you can practice creating a “zipper” (when you attach the clips to a string, something like fishing line, and clip the pegs to your pet’s skin, then all you do is pull the string like a zipper so they are screaming in pleasurable pain.) or just find out if you and your sub enjoy the pain received from these devices. You can also use them as nipple clips—just remember to attach them like other nipple clips, to the side of the nipple, not right on it…unless that’s something you’ve agreed to do.

You can also use the large clips from office supply stores as nipple clamps. Be careful. They HURT!

If you’re really into inflicting pain on the cheap, buy some fishing line and a pack of clothesline pins. Drill a small hole in on arm of several pins (5-7 is ideal), thread the line through those, tying them off so each pin doesn’t slip, them clip them to your submissive…and YANK them off. Sublime pain!

Like spanking but tired of using your hand? How many of us were swatted with a wooden spoon? Really want to raise the pain? But a hair brush, spatula, wooden spoon are fine. But the best thing for a good solid and cheap spanking is a leather belt. Just be careful to not hit your pet with any of the metal. 

COLLARING AND LEASHES

I run collaredgirls.com. So of course I have ideas for my favorite aspect of the BDSM community: ownership. Ownership–having an s-type–is wonderful, if you’re lucky enough to find a 24/7 submissive. Ownership is powerful. And every owner  needs a collar for their pet, a symbol of ownership.

Want a makeshift collar and leash? I got the answer for you there too: Grab a leather belt and adjust it to your pet’s neck. A former submissive did this on her own as a tribute to me. She wore it religiously now… for obvious reasons. There are a couple options to do the leash. If you have a leash handy then you’re all set. If you don’t, then you can go REALLY low cost and create on with duct tape or, if you have it, get some rope. Some D- and s-types prefer regular white line from a hardware store (3/4-1/2”). Ropes like yellow plastic/nylon rope would be useless because it wouldn’t tie.

BE CREATIVE

If you do want something more, then look around at what you have. You can re-purpose nearly anything. Be creative. I love looking at garage sales for ideas too. Another person’s junk might very well be this Dominant next toy. As always, be cognizant of the dangers

Of course, there are other tools you can find in your home right now—like the vanilla feather and ice (though, when combined with true sensory deprivation, they can be quite effective in raising a s-type to their high).

Don’t think you need a large arsenal of high priced tools as you start your journey. D/s relationships aren’t created equally. We are all different, so testing the proverbial waters is imperative. The best way to determine your needs and wants is to use the most basic, rudimentary options at your disposal and build from there. The best part of the above tool suggestions is that anything you don’t end up0 liking can be repurposed and used in your everyday, mundane life.

Miss Ruby

Miss Ruby

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