Our Violent Tendencies: How #BDSM Helps Us Control Our Natural Human Tendencies

By 2019-08-20Uncategorized

From an early age, I saw sexual violence all around Me. While Al Gore hadn’t invented the internet yet (that’s a joke; he misspoke and it kinda stuck for the poor guy), I saw it in moves, I experienced it (I was raped by a man down the street for whom I did yard work for over a year), and I saw it in comic books and other graphic mediums.

When the internet came around, it opened Me up to an entirely new world. Rarely did I get off on it. The CNC wasn’t really My thing, but the binding and the de-personalization and the encasement all piqued something in Me, something I didn’t understand for years to come.

Violence is a natural part of human existence.

Violence is human.

It’s how we use and control our violent tendencies that shows our character too.

Many of Us lash out at others, verbally and physically. Again, to a degree this is normal. Our sports show how violent we are. Boxing, football, soccer/futbol, basketball, and so many others, are violent in some manner.

We need to lash out in some way.

I believe even pacifists are violent humans. Mother Teresa, Gandhi, and Dr. King all controlled their natural tendencies toward physical violent, but they were, in the most basic way, verbally violent. Mother Teresa, in several article and in the documentary “Hell’s Angel,” is argued to be aloof, uncaring and basically kind of a bitch. Gandhi and Dr. King encouraged violent non-violence (which, in BDSM parlance, would be similar to Our Consensual Non-Consent, CNC).

Violence exists.

But in BDSM, with few exceptions, we have learned to control our violent tendencies thought various tactics.

Some people enjoy “mind fucks,” in which We force Our submissives into situations that mess with their minds.

Others, like Me, thrive in physical pain, sadism.

Some submissive types love mind fucks, to be controlled through words, words that force them to become something else, a toy, a doll, an item of pleasure.

Others enjoy pain.

It’s all violence. We just know how to control it.

In a previous piece I recommended Dominants and submissives at least start their dynamic with a list of hard and soft limits.

Our propensity for violence needs control, and these types of lists help Us do that. They are meant as guides so We don’t go off-the-rails on Our submissives.

The beauty of BDSM, for Me, is how it allows Me, and My subs, to experience new things, some of them very violent. But like the controlled violence of Mother Teresa, Gandhi, Dr. King and so many other peaceful individuals, We must learn to control these tendencies.

Controlled and consensual violence is the ultimate therapy.

Violence is a beautiful thing when done correctly and safely. Yes. That sound like an oxymoron, but if you’ve been in a serious dynamic for a while, you understand how the violence acts as a release for Us.

Violence releases the endorphins and other “drugs” that drive Us to subspace and DomSpace. That’s a good thing. The controlled violence all of Us understand in the BDSM community releases Us from our animalistic violent tendencies out there, outside our sessions and Our lifestyles. It makes it so we see what others do in a different light.

We’ll always lash out at others, but BDSM’s rule of consensual violence is a good thing, so keep beating the shit out of your subs. Goodness knows they deserve Our love.

Miss Ruby

Miss Ruby

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